by Trey Magnifique
I was plannin’ a swank dinner for a group of friends, y’know, with a sit-down table and plates and everything. See, I had a first date. I met a nice person over to the dance place and one of us had too much moonshine and asked her out and she and her friends talked about it and played paper, rock, scissors and she shouted “CRAP!” and then said “Yes” to me. And now I already know she enjoys the rock, paper, scissors game. :) Cool.
So’s I was speakin’ to the Landlord there, ‘cause I wanted to use the empty Fairy Tale place and he sez “No.” So I asked about the ‘nother spot... “No!” before I can finish even. So’s I decided to have dinner over to my place, but outside the cave, ‘cause of the dank, smelly bits, which is the whole cave ‘cept for the sunny bit by the door. But that’s where that furry person curls up so that wouldn’t go over well neither, I’m guessing.
And here’s the problem,see? Mud. Lots of it kind of running around, ‘cause the landlord, that Reyn fella, doesn’t seem to know much ‘bout that irrigation thing, or maybe reverse irrigation in this case. Yeah, like drainingation. So half the time the place is a bit muddy; I secretly call it names like BullRoar Acres, but mostly BullCrap Park. I guess my “couth sliders” are low in the settings or somethin’.
And the mud is totally tidal or some such. It gets flowing and the mountains pinch it into this channel thing and next thing y’know it’s Holy Fundy Batman, neck deep sort of thing ‘cause the mud is in a pinchy, sustained wave that bounces off the ‘nother mountain and ricochettings right back at you: Splorsh!
So’s I hire a person, Kacey, to help out ‘cause she says she knows plate settings or somethin’ and I invite the Cap’n and Ginny, and I ask Madame BurBurry if she’s free and she says my project is overdue and do I ever want to graduate and I don’t want that talk at my swank dinner, so I ask Madrid J. if she wants to join us ‘cause she’s quiet, and nervous though. And of course my date, Xero Gods, she’s totally “whatever” which is so much better than “really?”
So’s I check the mud levels and the tidal clocks and figure I better add a dining berm in front of the waterfalls, and if it gets bad we can wash off in the waterfalls and clean up them rental dishes, same time. Cool. I think we do a pretty good job, considering the ruins are already half covered in mud but there’s heavy rains scheduled in the north mountains so the mud should be thinner by evening, easy wading.
I see Ginny is already drinking from the bottle. Cap’n is disgruntled, but he’s always disgruntled. “Prawns are totally buggered!” he growls. “Left ‘em in the back seat of the van and now totally shite!”
Seems everything else is pretty good, got plates and Kacey has orbdures or somethin’ smells pretty decent anyway. I seem to have dropped my mud-squeegee. Hey! Is that a prawn?
So dinner’s not so bad ‘cept for the no prawns thing but Kacey whipped up some pretty good meat dish and some bean thing and then a couple of fruit pies and we laughed that we could make all the mud pies we want. Well, I laughed. The Cap’s said, “Smells like a snail’s arse here.” Ginny took a pull from the bottle. Xero wrinkled her nose; she’ so cute when she’s angry. Madrid just stared straight ahead, I guess she’s back in the meditation thing.
So’s I asked Kacey to hand out some of those sweet liquor drinks what people hand out after a swank meal. Looked like we were going to pull the whole thing together and that’s when the richetting mud tsunami glorped over the foothills protecting the waterfall cove and kind of took away the fun edge that had been growing, what with all them sweet liquor drinks.
Ginny switched to a straw and the Cap’n was mighty stoic, least that’s how he called it, “mighty GD stoic”. Xero cried for a few minutes and Madrid blinked and I held a fancy, shiny tea pot up and she fogged it so’s it was all okay. And I guess that’s the thing. In My GCG all’s well that ends well, and mud dries up, and when that last dollop falls out of your pants it’s like it never happened.
So’s the Cap’n gently laid Ginny in the back of their van and scooched off. Xero teleported Madrid home and told me to wait for her call. I washed up some stuff in the ‘falls while Kacey knocked prawns out of the decorative bushes, all’s well. Good times in #MyGCG. :)
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